Life with Fast Boy

The Challenges of Raising Our ADHD Son

Archive for the ‘Behavioral Problems’ Category

Frustrated!

Posted by One Tired Mama on January 11, 2010

I’ve been absent for a while now. Not just absent from this blog, but from my life at home. I burnt out. I gave up. I pretty much walked away. I was ready to move out and leave Fast Boy and Princess with their father. Luckily, financial instability and a good dose of anti-depressants kept me here. I’m glad that I’m back and trying to make things work, but damn it’s hard sometimes!

Yesterday I decided to make a vision board. You know, a visual respresentation of things you want in your life. It’s a Law of Attraction thing. And some unknown part of me decided to make this a family project. My husband was into it. Princess was into it. I had to twist Fast Boy’s arm to go to the store with us to get poster board and glue sticks.

Once we got to the store, Fast Boy began to participate. He voted that we make one big family vision board instead of individual ones. He picked out some other craft things he wanted to try. I was feeling optmistic.

As soon as we got home, Fast Boy went back to the television. Princess and I started looking through magazines to find pictures of things that represent what makes us happy and things we wanted for our future. She was much more materialistic about it than I was, but she is 7 after all. (She found a lava lamp, a television, a telephone, nail polish, a house, a heart and a puppy.) The Boss Man set about finding things on the computer.

I pleaded with Fast Boy to join us. I asked him to make a list of things he wanted and things that make him happy. He just kept watching TV. I was tempted to turn it off, but the battle I would have faced would have put me into a place where the vision board wouldn’t have happened at all. I eventually got him to cut out a few pictures… of breakfast bars, Smuckers PB&J sandwiches and Scooby-Doo videos. Sigh…

Well, the rest of us finished our vision board. We each had our own section, but there was some sharing and overlap. Here is what we ended up with:

There we have, on one piece of poster board, the symbolism of our life. With one big empty dark gray spot. Yes, that’s horrible, but that’s how I’m feeling. I’m trying not to.

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Posted in Behavioral Problems, Gratitude, Life in General | 6 Comments »

Masters of Manipulation

Posted by One Tired Mama on December 17, 2008

I haven’t posted in quite some time, I know. Does that mean things have been quiet? Unfortunately, no. However, things have gotten better in the past year. Nobody is getting hit in the face with sticks and so far there have been no in-school suspensions. (Knock on wood.)

One of the largest problems that I have faced in the past year is that my children have become masters of manipulation. They know I’m tired and they know if they push me far enough, I will back down. Even on my strong days, both Fast Boy and Princess have me throwing my hands up in the air and wanting to give up.

I read the following article and thought it sounded JUST like what it going on in my house. Thought I’d share:

Masters of Manipulation: How Kids Control You With Behavior

I love how it says “You can be sure your child knows what it takes to make you back down.” That is SO true! My children definitely do. Princess throws temper tantrums, but at least she backs down without hurting someone or something. Fast Boy will keep going until he has physically damaged something the we can’t afford to fix or replace. He certainly knows our weak spots. He’s had lots of practice figuring it out. But, how much damage do you let them do while you are ignoring the manipulative behavior?

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